Is it depression or spiritual awakening?

It could be both.

Before I get into the similarities and the differences between periods of depression and spiritual awakening, I want to remind you how serious periods of immense pain can be. Whether you are a practitioner who is supporting clients who may be experiencing depression/having an awakening or if this is something you are experiencing yourself, please know when to seek additional support. It’s always wise to determine who your personal and professional supports will be before you need it.

What is depression?

Everyone experiences some form of depression at times, but when we think about depression there are some qualities that differentiate it from normal periods of feeling low.

Everyone at times will experience grief, sadness and emotional pain, usually triggered by some kind of loss or hardship. Feeling grief, pain and sadness is part of healthy processing of life’s difficult experiences.

True depression has some similarities but what makes depression different from normal periods of sadness and pain is the quality and the way the pain surfaces from deep within. While depression can be triggered by external circumstances, what follows is deeper, like a surfacing of old buried wounds and traumas to be fully felt and experienced in the present.

What is spiritual awakening?

I will admit, for a long time I didn't give much thought or attention to spiritual awakening because I assumed it was the way people described becoming newly interested in spirituality and seeing the world through a more expansive lens. Because I have always been spiritual, I didn't know I could experience a spiritual awakening and it was then through my own awakening that I realized how incomplete my understanding was.

And it's not surprising to me now that I am experiencing a new wave of clients coming to me for support after or during their own spiritual awakening experiences, so I thought I would share my new expansive understanding.

Spiritual awakening is a real energetic and psychological transformation that can occur quite spontaneously. It can sometimes be triggered by a very difficult external circumstance like sudden severe illness or loss but it can also be triggered by an energetic shift such as a kundalini activation.

The language makes it sound like a beautiful and holy experience. However, in reality a spiritual awakening often pushes people to the limits of their nervous system capacity. People experience distinct stages or phases during their awakening that can take months or years to move through. Each stage serves a purpose. Each stage presents it's own unique challenges. The stages of awakening feel very distinct from each other but a person can move back and forth through them, like a two steps forward, one step back journey of progression.

Spiritual awakening is a death and rebirth happening within life. Aspects of us that die or are lost can include our identity, our attachments, relationships, how we relate to the world and more. It's not a simple awakening to spirituality, it is a rapid expansion of your spiritual awareness or proximity to God/oneness.

During this process, old deep wounds, even ancestral traumas and beliefs can come to the surface to be fully felt and released and this is where spiritual awakening and depression can feel and look very similar. This stage of awakening is often referred to as the dark night of the soul.

As someone who has experienced many waves of depression during this life as well as a very profound spiritual awakening I do believe that each period of depression has in it's own way been a kind of spiritual awakening. Not with the distinct stages, no ego dissolving, no loss of attachments etc, but the commonality is the experience of depression being a contraction before an expansion.

If you or someone you are supporting is experiencing either depression or spiritual awakening, one of the most beautiful ways you can be of service to them is to be present through their experience. You don't have to understand what they are experiencing to be a witness to it. You don't have to have the answers to listen. During both periods of depression and spiritual awakening these are the resources that have been most supportive for me and others I have supported:

• counselling

• Reiki sessions

• yoga, pranayama, meditation

• journaling

• barefoot walks in nature, swimming in the river, laying on the earth

• friends or loved ones who can listen without trying to fix or control my experience

• spiritual resources including spiritual texts or lectures, devotional chanting, satsang, ceremony

While I'm still moving through my transformation I can already see the beauty and the blessings that come from this very difficult transition. It has been both the most difficult and uncertain time of my life but also the most holy and I am most grateful for the growth and expansion it has provided.

If you or someone you are supporting is experiencing either depression of spiritual awakening, please use your resources including clinical support when it may be needed. Know and listen to your limits. This blog post about holding space within your own nervous system capacity can help you navigate this experience.